Been hurt too many times by pathetic lies and cowardly actions- the time has come for me to say 'Goodbye'

I’m not the letters in my name
I am not a snake or a ladder
a game, you seem to think of me,
let love beat and hate heat.
That I could and would never be
I’m sorry if with you I forgot the meaning of ‘happy’
but another plan for us has destiny
one where you be you
and I be me
one where each other never again we see
one where the grass is healthy and beautifully green

The future holds a golden land in the centre of its palm
a land in which smiles are an individual grain of sand
you made your bed now without me lay in it missing the tracing of my thumb
me myself and I
my ring is on my hand
I am the lead singer in my band
you, a grain of sand
no matter to me

Don’t you worry no longer will you hurt me
no longer will I be in sight
I’m not seeing the light of tomorrow in your eyes
I’m gone tonight
I loved you
hope you enjoyed hurting me
abuse
insults
my weakness
I have found my strength in the pain

goodbye
-
-
-

You hurt me, but 'I'll Pray For You' I don't hate you I just regret the path I took with you. Buena suerte

I’m torn,

between two,

mi cariño y tu

you hurt me, 

I loved the man you could never be. 

And now, 

me está matando.

despacio,

usted me está matando. 

Fui una estupida, 

I believed you. 

Usted es un mentiroso.

I listened to your lies, 

Te amo- 

your biggest lie.

Me rindo contigo,

entonces 

Buena suerte!

Espero que te haga feliz. 

Se acabó.

I’m moving on 

and you should too.

Que Dios te bendiga.

Que Dios esté contigo.

I’ll pray for you.

We have all felt 'Trapped' at least once in our lives,but maybe we are our biggest enemy and only oppressor.

Trapped.

I'm trapped.

Trapped by my mistakes.

Nowhere to run.

Nowhere to hide.

Just console the man inside,

Man up!

Take the suffocation,

just like a man.

The 'Man',

Society,

expects you to be.

Never mind that I am a woman.

I am trapped,

in the prison.

The prison of all the things that are not 

my fault.

I am a lady.

Born a lady.

Of course,

it's my fault.

Shoulda just been man 

I ain't 'bout dat life.

Nah.

I am a woman.

Not a wo'man'.

's that too hard to understand?

I am half of your world

start treating me as such.

I am beauty

start telling me 

the terms you use towards me 

should be 

anti-derogatory

There are not many things that I'm not.

but there is one...

Your labels.

Something I never was

And never will be.

Yes I am trapped.

but...

I am not trapped in your words,

I am trapped,

In my freedom.

You only realise how lucky you were when your luck is in jeapordy and you are so far from your heartbeat and the blessing that befell you on the special day that started your life. I miss 'My heartbeat'

Asleep
awake
in between
nothing but lonely sheets
wish I could escape, sleep
dream
that’s what he use to be
a dream
but
I am
no longer thirteen
now he’s reality
and only beauty to me
awake, only just
and on my mind, him
I can twist
and in my heart, him
I can turn
and on my skin, his touch
even more then, I yearn
and on my lips, his
so I lay there
nothing I can do
but feel my heart set a light and begin to burn
even then, still
within my heart a hole
one that I can’t without him fill
nothing surrounding me
wishing him beside me
nothing,
wishes are for the weak
just bare sheets
missing the way he made my heart skip beats
in the cold, I freeze
to that he was and always will be
the heat
my breath
the reason for the current existence of me
my favourite seat
my heartbeat

Just when you think you have esacped your past and moved right on you get hit with that one line that makes you think otherwise ‘I’ll Make You Forget Him’

‘I’ll make you forget him’

At that, the lights grew dim
I hate nothing more than I do him

While you aim to make me forget-
you cause the memories and my mind to connect.
I called him amazing and you I still do perfect

‘I’ll make you forget him’

Do I accept?
Do I allow instinct to kick in?
Too late. I reject.

while your arm beneath me
red is all I see
nice to finally view what you make of me truly

You’ll  make me ‘forget him’

Honestly.
if I hadn’t already
then in your bed on your arm I wouldn’t be

Next time before you revive my past- think carefully.
or it will soon be
that she will have to try and make you forget me.

 

The pain of seperation from the love of your life makes your heart feel like it's been ripped out of you and trampled on and you are left 'Torn Apart' and weak without a heart

So many words unspoken
fragments of the heart unbroken
parts of you untouched
disruption of our facility- unjust
bed sheets unadorned by our skin
no use hiding the emptiness within
loneliness armed and ready to kill
I’m still waiting for the thrill
but yet again disappointment takes the lead
stranded without you watching my heart bleed
smiles and exhilaration torn apart
left with nothing but a core stabbed with a poisoned dart
saying it will only mean strength is weakening
with nothing to hold at the arrival of the evening

Since '07.10.15' my stength and weakness have been one and lived side by side under the morning sun- '07.10.15' (Strenght vs Weakness)

My pain,
you.
But with you near...
...all that, is clear
I need you here;
though here you can’t possibly be.
You are not holding me

You turn my world a light
but the light is killing me
I need you
turn it off- only you know how to
you heat the coldest parts of my heart
but its burning
come put out the fire
my current situation without you is dire
remember  the negativity is in their heads
will soon be dead 

My weakness,

you are
but with you I am strong.
It is without you that I can barely stand.
Hand in hand,
without wings I can fly.
Alone, standing there, with nothing to live for
that’s when I die.
It’s hard to understand
but then, everyone else is above land
while my heart is thirsty and buried under dry sand
embrace and affection
we’ll have our turn  
but life holds a long line
from now till the end of time, it’s us against them