Friday, 14 November 2014

When you realize you have been chasing someone who is not worth your effort or time my advice to you is to walk away- 'When I Came To Realize'

‘My heart was yours for the taking
our love was history in the making
now it’s me who is more than just aching’
He spoke. I heard him. Then his silence was the reason my heart began quaking because I knew he was waiting. Waiting for the words to escape my prison cell. Waiting for my forgiveness. But they wouldn't. His eyes caressed the surface of my heart, before dragging it under the deepest darkest most taunting sea. His eyes. Captivating me. The crowd began whispering words portraying their confusion. I was lost in their words and his eyes within seconds. I was there but I was gone. I was lost in the darkness of the past... our past.  

Though I was lost in the past, I seemed to have been found in the faint visions of our future together because that is where my heart wanted to be even if my mind refused to give in and insisted in reliving the sorrow of the past in memory.

He was standing in front of me.
I tried to find within me what it was I fell for within him, what it was that I loved... 
I found myself asking and pleading for the answer to the question.....
Do I love him?
I turned my back to him and began to walk away at the enlightenment of the fact that did not love him and I do not love him, I possibly never did
It was all lust trodding on my heart.

His eyes filled up with tears. I didn't see them do so but I know they did, I heard it in his voice and as it trailed off I heard the connection his heart made with the floor because he didn't carry his heart on his sleeve but in his eyes. The eyes I fell for. The eyes I was walking away from. They didn't mean to me anymore than he did- he meant less than nothing.

Wednesday, 5 November 2014

This was my reply to my sweetheart telling me he loves me for the first time, I Love You Too

I am glad you do 
because life isn't the same without you
If ever I find you gone I don't know what I'd do 
Because the truth is 
You can cover your ears to things you don't want to hear you can block things out of memory
but you can't tell your heart how to feel 
So I know that this is real 
Trust me when I say 
There is nothing I want more than for you and me forever to stay 
Because the secret I have been holding in for so long it actually burns me to is...
I love you too 
Please don't again ask me 'how are you'
Because the answer will always be
I am blessed because I have you
remember before you ask me how I feel about you
the answer will forever and always be I love you too