Friday, 4 April 2014

I never wanted to use you as an example for this but after the last couple of months and today especially I have no choice, oh wait I do and sorry but I don't choose you - It's Decision Time

After months of five
he chooses to renter my life
and it cuts me like a knife
but I have to decide
is it wrong or right
nothing and no-one in sight
just these words on my laptop screen set alight
it’s 6am and he’s got me feeling like it’s late at night
he is in hackney on the other side
asking of me to jump from a considerable height
telling me he will catch me and I don’t need to worry or cry
but I know him all too well to know it’s a lie
not knowing what to say because it took me months to climb
but I know if I listen to him chances are he will laugh and watch me die
I don’t want to look back from heaven to see my mother cry and father sigh
don’t want my sisters to think violence is okay or see my brother committing crime
love and lust have limits but  this is just crossing the line
I still remember everything he said about the mother of mine
I showed no care nor did I mind
I finished crying in the instant that you left
because the pain had vanished in the theft
though deep within remains a cleft
sorrow never stays I have met a man who is in all aspects deft
but if the knife was on my throat, if I had to decide
it would be anyone but you taking me for a ride
yet you still wonder why our love we’d always hide
and I questioned why my house you never came inside
it’s time to decide
you have the mentality of a child
I love a man not a boy
I was your girl not your toy
but before I leave make sure it’s your life you dearly enjoy
I wish you only the best
even if with your gun I was shot beneath my left breast
it was time to decide
I have made my pick
it's you who makes me sick
this is goodbye
now without you I will soar I will fly
and be sure to watch you die

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